Spiritual Guidance Blog
Life’s Smooth and Bumpy Roads
by Robert Meagher on 03/06/23
Once again, this month I am going to use my passion for
cycling to retell a recent adventure. The cycling adventure held within its
teachings a wonderful metaphor for life.
I was out for one of my day-long rides. I went back to an
area that I had explored a few weeks earlier. At a point in my ride, I had the
choice of turning north on March Road, but I had found March Road to be both
bumpy and heavy in car traffic—not a good combination for safe riding. So, this
time around, I decided to cycle further west so that I could take another route
north.
I cycled west to Panmure, along Upper Dwyer Hill Road, and
turned North on Panmure Road. I immediately felt this was a much better route
north, over the Carp Ridge. The road was quiet and had little car traffic. I
was also pleasantly surprised that the road was very smooth. What a difference
from the other route north! I was so glad I had cycled further west so I could
turn north on Panmure Road.
Panmure Road turned into the Donald B. Munro Drive that had
me, eventually, cross over the Carp Road. On the north side of Carp Road, my
smooth ride came to an end. The Donald B. Munro Drive became bumpy and full of
cracks. As long as I was cycling on the flats, it wasn’t too bad. But if I
found myself cycling downhill, the chatter from the bumpy road really took its
toll on my body. My whole upper body would shake and tremor from the cracks in
the road. Fortunately, the car traffic remained light and I could cycle out
more to the centre of the road where the asphalt was a little smoother. As I
approached Dunrobin, the road smoothed out again. Once I turned on to Dunrobin
Robin, there was a nice, smooth paved shoulder to cycle on.
As I quietly made my way back toward home on smooth road
surfaces, I smiled at the experience that took me from Upper Dryer Hill Road to
Dunrobin Road, along Panmure Road and the Donald B. Munro Drive. The road
started out smooth, then became uncomfortably rough, then smoothed out again. What
a beautiful metaphor for life!
Sometimes in our lives everything goes smoothly. We glide
along with few, if any, obstructions. The wind can feel like its at our backs,
pushing us along. We experience a smooth ride through life. Then, unexpectedly,
through no seeming fault or cause of our own making, we encounter bumps in the
road that can really take a toll on us. We go through periods of ‘bumpy rides’
before life calms down again.
Life can seem like that sometimes, can’t it? Smooth and
effortless, then bumpy roads that have us holding on tight. To navigate these
ups and downs in life I have found the Buddhist practice of the ‘middle way’ to
be helpful. The middle way may be described as an approach to life where we
avoid extremes. This approach includes extremes in emotions and thought.
As I turned on to Panmure Road and gave thanks for a
smoother surface than March Road to take me north, I knew that ‘this too shall
change.’ As I crossed over the Carp Road and the Donald B. Munro Drive became
bumpy, I knew that ‘this too shall change.’ While I was grateful for the smooth
road surface on Panmure Road, I knew better than to be jubilant. While I was
feeling uncomfortable with the bumpiness on the Donald B. Munro Drive, I knew
better than to be dejected. I knew the road surface would change from what it
currently was.
The gift of life is inherent in our ability to learn how to
be happy where we are, instead of trying to be happy where we are not. We have
a tendency to wish away the present moment by wishing we were somewhere else.
If I’m on a bumpy road, my tendency may be to wish I was on a smoother road
surface. But that bumpy road is teaching me something; something that is
important for me to learn. Can I sink into that awareness and welcome the
experience, no matter how uncomfortable it may be?
Robert Meagher has
been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual
Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.
You Don’t Have To Like It To Love It
by Robert Meagher on 01/03/23
Last year I signed up for the Great Cycle Challenge (GCC)
taking place throughout August. The GCC was to raise money for cancer research
for children. I have an increasing passion for cycling and I have a personal
connection to childhood cancer. So, signing up for the event was a no-brainer
for me. My personal connection with childhood cancer is that my partner’s,
niece’s daughter is currently undergoing treatment for lymphoma.
I began my fundraising in earnest! I was pleasantly
surprised by how much I enjoyed the fundraising. It was exciting. Each donation
I would receive filled my heart with joy, knowing how generous people were
being and the support they were showing for the cause.
As with most anything in life, at least in this material
world, you will have people who will support certain things, and others who
will not. Deep into my fundraising efforts, an acquaintance responded to one of
my fundraising emails to congratulate me on signing up for the GCC and wishing
me well with my challenge. This acquaintance went on to share with me that they
could not, however, in good conscience support the medical research behind the
cause. This acquaintance expressed the view (and the same view as many other
people share) that such medical research has been taken over by the
pharmaceutical industry which has zero motivation to cure cancer, because their
efforts to find a cure for cancer is really a thinly-veiled attempt to create a
‘cash cow.’ My acquaintance closed the response with a wish that my partner’s,
niece’s daughter “truly heals from her cancer.” I responded to my
acquaintance’s comments by thanking them for their support, blessing them, and
sending them love.
I was initially taken back by my acquaintance’s response to
my fundraising email. I quickly got over my reaction, realizing the message had
nothing to do with me, personally. The response from my colleague was such a
blessing and such a wonderful teaching. It got me thinking…
As a practicing therapist, one of the golden rules of
therapy is to always, always, always, meet the client where they are. If the
person is ready for a certain approach to healing, then that is what you start
with. Who am I to judge what approach anyone would use to heal themselves? If
the client thinks that eating Tim Horton’s donuts is what’s going to heal them,
what purpose does it serve to tell them they are wrong? In the end, whatever we
think will heal us, will heal us.
Had my acquaintance cared to enquire about my motivation
behind signing up for the GCC, my acquaintance would have learned that I shared
the same views as they did about the ethical nature of the medical system
undertaking research in the name of ‘finding a cure’ for whatever ails us. If I
had cancer, I may not be quick to dive into conventional treatment methods. I
would more likely look to alternative approaches, approaches that might be
considered by some to be more holistic in nature.
But in the case of the GCC, I put aside my own beliefs and
views, and decided to give back to life—a life that has given me so much! Who
am I to judge the motives of the medical industry? Who am I to judge someone
who has been diagnosed with cancer and decides to undergo traditional treatment
methods?
I don’t have to like something or someone to love that
something or someone. I don’t have to like the medical industry. I don’t have
to like cancer. In this instance, I put aside my views and personal opinions
and chose to love it all, and give where I could.
There is a magnificent teaching from a great spiritual tradition
that if someone asks you to do something that is insane, do it anyway, so long
as it doesn’t hurt anybody. Even if you don’t agree with it!
Like with so many things in my life, and spirit-led things,
I had been approached by a colleague, who knew I was a cycling enthusiast, to
sign up for the GCC. I took this request, as most others, as a sign from Life
that there’s something in this for me and I won’t interfere with what I am
being offered. I will just go ahead and do it. I’ve never regretted this
approach to life! I may not like it, but I can love it!
Robert Meagher has
been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual
Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.
Playing With Your Fears
by Robert Meagher on 12/05/22
I was recently out for one of my day-long cycling adventures
in the Gatineau Hills / Park, a favorite summertime playground for me. I was
well into the ascent of one of the longer and steeper hills in the park. It was
the third time I had made this ascent on this day and I was tired. As I neared
the summit, I told myself, “Just keep your head down and keep peddling!...breathe…breathe…breathe!!!
I was rounding a sharp corner and something out of the corner of my eye
distracted me, however. I lifted my head and…
Only 20-30 feet in front of me, on the other side of the
road, was a mother black bear and four cubs. What had distracted me was that
the mother had been standing on her hind legs and when she dropped back down on
all fours, her movement had caught my peripheral vision.
The mother bear let out a soft, yet deep, growl. I thought
to myself… “That can’t be good!” My next thought was… “I can’t turn around at
this point because the grade is too steep. If I try and turn around, I will
simply topple over (based on my experience!) and turning around means turning
in the direction of the bears (as they were on the other side of the road)…and
I don’t want to be moving closer to the bears!” Then I thought… “Uh oh…I’m
trapped! I can’t turn around. I can’t go to my right, because I’ll fall off a
cliff! I can’t go to my left, because I’ll be moving closer to the bears!”
When the mother bear let out her soft, yet, deep growl, the
cubs bolted for the forest on the other side of the road. But there was a steep
embankment where the cubs bolted towards and two of the cubs clung to some
rocks and tree stumps half way up the embankment. The other two cubs tumbled
back down the embankment, to come to rest at momma bear’s feet.
Momma bear looked at me again. She let out another soft, yet
deep, growl…as if to say to her cubs “Follow me!” Momma bear turned around
(away from me) and started to run up the hill I had been making my way up. The
cubs scrambled after momma. After running up the hill about 15-20 feet, momma
bear stopped, turned around to look at me again, then turned back around and
continued running up the hill, with baby bears hot on her heels. A few seconds
later, momma bear and baby cubs had turned into the forest and were able to
make their get-a-way.
Just before the bears dove into the forest, another cyclist
came screaming around the corner, coming down the hill at high speed. I yelled
“Bears!!!”…pointing directly across the road from me. The cyclist hit their
brakes and careened toward me. Fortunately, the cyclist was able to gain
sufficient control of their bicycle to avoid colliding with me. As I watched
the bears disappear into the forest, I resumed my climb. For the next kilometre,
I warned cyclists that were making their way down the hill (I was continuing to
climb) of my bear siting.
The further I moved / cycled away from the scene / encounter
with the bears, the more I felt the tension ease in my body, until I was in my
relaxed state again. I became aware of just how afraid I was. I hadn’t
panicked, in the sense of screaming or running for my life…but I was afraid
just the same. I can remember having the thought “So…this is how it’s going to
end!” I had never been that close to bears in the wild. I remembered the
feeling of having momma bear staring at me so intently that I almost felt an
out of body experience. I remembered thinking “Talk to the bear…tell her it’s
okay…tell her I’m not going to hurt her or her cubs.” I remembered seeing the
drool/foam around the momma bear’s muzzle. I remembered thinking the bears were
so close I could smell them.
I made it through the experience alive, obviously; here I am
recounting the experience to you. But in truth, I was never in danger for an
instant. Only my fear thoughts had me in danger. That I didn’t panic was,
perhaps, a good thing. But even if I had panicked, it would only have been my
panicky and fearful thoughts that would have expressed themselves, not actually
what was happening.
Whenever we’re in a situation that scares us, remember, it’s
not the situation itself that is fearful, it’s our thoughts about the situation
that are fearful and, consequently, make us feel scared. Everything is neutral.
It’s our thoughts that determine how and what we experience.
Robert Meagher has been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.
Keep Practicing and One Day It Will Become Second Nature
by Robert Meagher on 11/02/22

One cycling day last month I headed out to one of my favorite
destinations. Just 1 km from my destination, at the furthest point from my
where I started, my back tire went flat. I was directly across from a popular
rest stop, so I gently rolled myself into the stop.
I took my bicycle repair kit out of my pannier bags, along
with my previously-prepared instructions to fix a flat tier, and began the
process. Shortly after I began repairing the tire, I young man stopped and
asked if I had everything I needed. I said yes, thanked the man, and wished him
a good day. I continued with my tire repair and a few minutes later a man and
woman stopped to ask if I needed any help. I was well along in my repair and
responded, “This isn’t exactly something I do every day, but I think I’ll be
okay.”
There must have been something in my voice or written on my
face, but the man said, “How about I stick around to see if you’ll need any
help.” I thanked the man, saying “That’s very kind of you. Thank you.”
It wasn’t too long after that exchange that I ran into a
snag with putting the repaired inner tube back into the tire. The man could see
I was struggling, and said… “Here, let me help.” A few minutes later, I was
back on track and 5 minutes after that, I had the tire back on the bike and was
ready to hit the road again. I continued my cycling adventures for the day and
made it back home safely.
The next day, I decided to take my bike into the local bike
shop to have them check the bike. I explained to the bike jockey that I had a
flat tire the previous day, and that I was able to fix the flat and get myself
back home. I explained that because I was not confident in my mechanical
ability, I would appreciate him taking a quick look over my bike to make sure I
put everything back together correctly.
I watched the bike jockey quickly put the bike up on the
hoist, quickly remove the tire from the bike, quickly and effortlessly check
the tire and the gear mechanism, put the tire back on the bike, and adjust
everything so that it was like brand new and coming off the assembly line at
the factory.
I had been coming to this bike shop for many years. Early
on, I couldn’t even change a flat tire. No doubt, I had been a butt of a few
jokes among the bike jockeys about my lack of mechanical abilities. But over
the years, I had become comfortable repairing a flat tire; given I had
experienced more than my fair share of flat tires over the years while out on
my cycling adventures. I’m just not as confident getting the tire back on the
bike and making sure the gear mechanism is properly in place and calibrated
properly.
As I watched the bike jockey look over my bike, it was clear
he had lots of practice repairing bicycles. Afterall, it’s his job. He could
repair a flat tire with his eyes closed! The more practice I get fixing a flat
tire, the more confident I get repairing the bicycle on my own. Each time I
take my bicycle in to the local bike shop and watch the bike jockey work on my
bike, I learn something new.
The above story and experience are no different than my
spiritual practice. The more I practice, the more my practice becomes second
nature. After enough practice, I don’t even need to think about what I’m doing.
My mind and body seemingly remember for me. So, keep practicing. One day you’ll
notice your work is paying off. One day you’ll notice it’s no longer practice,
it’s your life.
Robert Meagher has been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.
The Purpose of Spiritual Practice Reveals Itself
by Robert Meagher on 10/04/22

During April, I experienced a protracted bout of influenza.
For 10 days I pretty much stayed in bed, only to get myself out of bed to do
something, anything to relief my discomfort. It was only after 14 days that I
started to feel well enough to return to regular activities. It is during times
of unwellness—dare I say suffering—that spiritual practice, if one has a
spiritual practice, comes in very handy.
I remember about 4 or 5 days into the illness, I wondered if
I might need medical attention (in the form of hospitalization), as I simply
could not stop coughing. The pain and discomfort in my chest worsened. Days 6-9
saw the virus move into my nasal passages and head. Yet the coughing
maintained, although not so virulently.
Throughout the 14 days of unwellness, there remained a
steadfast reminder of the very simple spiritual teaching… “This too shall
pass.” It’s true, everything and anything ephemeral shall pass. We may not know
how it will pass, but it will pass. This gentle, constant reminder “This too
shall pass.” always offered me the opportunity and gift of acceptance through
the teaching… “Let go of what was. Accept what is. And have faith in what will
be.”
Even when I was feeling my most uncomfortable, I repeated
the mantra, “Accept what is.” It was in the acceptance of my current state /
condition that I consciously allowed forgiveness to permeate my state of being.
I have had a tendency during past illnesses (e.g., colds, flus, etc.) to feel
sorry for myself, whine, complain, commiserate, get angry and cranky. There was
none of those emotions this time around. It sort of surprised me. But I
realized my spiritual practice was paying off!
Each day when we sit down to meditate, read spiritual
teachings, participate in dharma through community interaction, or whatever our
spiritual practice may be, we are training our minds to be at peace with
whatever presents itself to us.
While I cannot say I felt ‘at peace’ for the 14 days of my
unwellness. The absence of feeling sorry for myself, whining, complaining,
commiserating, getting angry and cranky, suggests to me I was at peace. This
simply would not have been possible without my spiritual practice. Why I engage
in daily spiritual practice had not only revealed itself to me, but it has
increased my resolve and commitment to maintain my practice.
Robert Meagher has
been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual
Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.