Being Offered Forgiveness

More than 25 years ago, I visited Egypt as part of a Mediterranean cruise I took with a group of friends. One of the ports of call on this cruise was Alexandria, Egypt. I had the option of visiting the Great Pyramids of Giza while stopped in Alexandria. We were in port for 8 hours. The drive to/from the Pyramids was 3 hours each way. My idea of a good time was not spending 6 hours in a car driving to / from the Pyramids and only having 1 hour (and rushed at that!) at the famous site itself. So, I opted to stay in Alexandria and roam around the city for the day. A few friends joined me.

We were visiting Alexandria during Ramadan. Before leaving the ship, we were asked to respect the Ramadan ritual of fasting and not be seen eating during the day.

As we roamed the streets and alleyways of Alexandria, my friends and I were drawn to the enormous vats of food being cooked by street vendors. The food looked so delicious! There was humus, babaganoush, fresh pita bread, various shrimp dishes, spiced vegetables…all being cooked in these enormous vats heated by open flames. The smells were intoxicating.  We noticed many locals going up to the street vendors and buying food. We had been told that it is customary for locals to buy their food from the vendors during the day, take the food home, and begin eating at sundown.

It was approaching noon and my friends and I were getting hungry. So, we decided to buy some food from the vendors. We gathered a feast of local delights and proceeded to find a private location to eat our food. We certainly wanted to respect the people of Alexandria and their traditions recognized during Ramadan, the most obvious that of fasting during the day.

My friends and I found a quiet back alley that was silent and had no foot traffic. I did notice this long alleyway was lined on both sides by sets of French doors. I also noticed there was a building at the end of the alleyway with a very tall spire. I assumed it was a mosque. I didn’t think anything more of the setting. One of my friends placed a small blanket on the ground. We laid out our food on the blanket and began to indulge in the food we had purchased. It was easily the best food I ate the entire trip!

Part way through our culinary indulgence, we heard the bells chime on the spire at the end of alleyway. In unison, the sets of French doors lining the alleyway flung open and dozens of Muslims poured out into the alleyway and made their way toward the mosque. I realized in that moment that the chiming of the bells was the Muslim custom of ‘call to prayer.’

Before we could react to the unfolding, and cover our food, dozens of locals were walking past us, with our buffet of local delicacies laid out on our blanket. Some of these locals frowned at us, some spat at us, some smiled and giggled. I remember feeling awful at what must have been seen as a very disrespectful gesture on our parts. I remember thinking, “I will never let this sort of thing happen again.” Famous last words!

Fast-forward more than 25 years…

During a recent visit with my partner living in a long-term care home, I took my partner for an outing to get us some lunch. We purchased our lunch and brought it back to the home. The long-term care home my partner is living in is called Hillel Lodge and is part of the Jewish Community Centre in Ottawa. This day happened to be Saturday, which is Sabbath in the Jewish tradition. Instead of eating our lunch in my partner’s room, we decided to bring our food down to the lobby of the home where there is a large, open area, with tables and chairs for people to gather and sit. There is a Café in this area but the Café is closed on Sabbath. I was aware that Sabbath service was being held in the on-site synagogue. I also noticed there was a table set up in the area we were sitting in. The table had some food on it. I figured there must be some sort of gathering that would be taking place in the area we were sitting in. But I didn’t think more about the situation. My partner and I sat down at a table, took out our lunch, and began eating.

You know what’s coming, don’t you?...

Soon after we began eating, we heard people coming out of Sabbath service. Before I knew it, a crowd of people from the service surrounded us, filling up all the other tables. These people began to enjoy their food from the table I had noticed was full of food. I then realized the food that had been laid out on the table was kosher food.

So…here was my partner and I…OH!...did I mention my partner does not recognize his Jewish tradition? So…here was my partner and I sitting in the middle of a gathering of people who had just come out of prayer service and were gathering with their community to, in the Jewish tradition, enjoy some kosher food, and we were there eating our non-kosher food. Flashbacks of sitting in the alleyway in Alexandria came flooding back! I couldn’t believe I had done it again! Yet again!

My partner and I quietly finished our meal as inconspicuous as possible. As my partner and I rose from our table to leave the gathering, I turned to put my coat on and glanced over toward the Rabbi who happened to be looking at me. I smiled and gave him a respectful bow. The Rabbi smiled and waved goodbye.

But there was something in the eyes of the Rabbi. Something I will never forget. It was a twinkle. He had sized up the scene very quickly and realized we knew what had unfolded. The Rabbi saw we meant no harm, that we had not been aware the space, on Saturdays at that time, was used by the community to gather after their prayer service. The Rabbi was offering me forgiveness in the truest sense. He was saying with his smile that there was nothing wrong with what had transpired and released us from any thought of wrong-doing or disrespectful behavior.

Robert Meagher has been ordained as an Interfaith Minister and certified as a Sacred Attention Therapy (SAT) Therapist. Robert is the Founder and Spiritual Director for Spiritual Guidance and Co-Founder of the Center for Human Awakening.